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  • Writer's pictureDanielle

Build Empires Not Beauty Cabinets: 6 Things to Do to Change the Female Conversation

Hello ladies, let’s have a coffee date.

I would like to start a healthy dialogue about the way we talk about ourselves when we’re together. And most importantly, let’s revisit how much time we spend talking about our appearance and aging, and revisit how much money we spend on trying to look “thin” and younger — I despise the word “thin” and prefer to talk about “being/feeling strong”.

Before we get started, let me level set: I am all for looking my best and aging gracefully, and welcome efficient and low cost solutions on how to achieve both throughout all seasons of life. I also live for a spa day. However, my big beef around these topics is this: why waste our valuable quality time together talking about the superficiality of looks and aging when we should be spending every possible moment strategizing and planning our world takeover and empowering each other to level up and use all unique aspects of our beauty, brains and boss lady business acumen to do big things. Ya feel me?

I’m convinced that if we spent our talk time focused on more important subject matter, and our hard earned money building our empires, we would already be in charge of everything.

Newsflash: Men don’t do this. When they get together they don’t talk about their weight or spend a significant amount of time together talking about the small car payment lineup of anti-aging skins care products that they apply daily.

Fun Facts: the anti aging beauty category is estimated to gross over $330B globally by 2021, and the average female will spend $225k300k on makeup in their lifetime, and the average American woman will use a minimum of 16 products before leaving the house – WTF! Can we all agree that we should spend our money and time in better places?! Like in therapy, or backing a female political candidate, or funding our own campaign, or on travel, or in savings, or in a cause we believe in, or starting a business?!

Ladies: this has to stop. We are wasting valuable time and resources.

In the #last90days here’s my challenge to you:

1| Do not talk about your weight or how you look in any social setting. It’s time to stop giving others, and the media, permission to critique us on these things.

2| When you rock a bathing suit, hot outfit, or tight workout number, do not comment about how “not fit enough” you are. It shouldn’t and doesn’t matter, and the more you de-emphasize this topic in conversation the more others will do the same. Confidence is contagious.

3| Get a *simple, budget-friendly, highly effective skin care routine on point, and move on with your life. And DO NOT buy one more single item. There will always be new products to trial, since the beauty industry is always trying to find ways to sell more. Reminder: unless your job involves trying and reviewing new products, you DO NOT need to trial new products every week/month/season. Doing this is a colossal waste of money and time. Society is constantly trying to remind all of us how unhappy we are without XYZ product or service or prescription – DO NOT buy into the hype!!! Find what works and stick with it.

*PSA: how well you age is mostly based on your genetics, what you consume and your sun bathing history. Water intake, daily and nightly moisturizer and a good sunscreen goes a long way.

4| Anytime someone gives you a positive comment on how you look, just say “Thank You”. Instead of responding with a comment about how you’re not that *insert compliment here*, pause and self talk yourself into accepting and believing the compliment.

5| Embrace the aging process. Stop letting society tell you that looking like your 20-year-old-self is the only way to live and have a happy life. This is a lie.

6| Replace anything you’re going to say about yourself or someone else’s appearance with a positive attribute. Especially when it comes to addressing little girls. Let’s spend less time talking about looks, and more on the great things we each bring to the table!

Time to boss up ladies. We got work to do.

xx, Danielle

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